JUST HIT 1200 VIEWS!  Thanks people!!

I'm not going to teach you anything today, so quit yer cryin...just me talking and sharing a few things because I know you want to listen.

Soooo...I'm doing makeup for a beautiful bride's wedding this Saturday and I couldn't be more excited.  There's something about seeing your work of art walking down the aisle and hearing other people say "OMG you look so pretty" to the bride...knowing it's your own masterpiece!

Anyone who lets me do their makeup for anything, in my opinion, is taking a risk because, well, I wear enough makeup to outfit an entire drag show.  I've been told I've toned it down lately, but mostly I think it's just because I've started using more neutral colors.  Anyway, on your wedding day you want to compliment your features, not camouflage your face.

Kate Middleton caught a lot of crap for doing her own makeup for her Royal Wedding, as she should.  Honestly, your wedding was ROYAL and you can't even hire a makeup artist.  Her face (foundation, blush, etc.) looks pretty good...maybe a little intense on the cheek color, but her eye makeup is horrendous.  Her lower lash line eyeliner is the wooooorst...uhhh we smudge for a reason.  Her eye shadow is too dark and there's no dimension to it at all...you ma'am receive a 4 out of 10.

Bridal makeup should be soft and should photograph well...this chick below...NAILED IT!

Moving on...

This is why I touch myself at night...and I'm not ashamed to admit it...hold while I go wash my hands...

If you don't already have it, do yourself a favor and BUY IT (Urban Decay Naked2, BETTER than the original Naked...I got mine at Sephora, comes with a sweet bonus lipgloss).  This palette works on EVERYONE, regardless of skin tone.

This palette can be used to create one of my all-time favorite eye looks.  This is the PERFECT eye and that's not my opinion, it's a dang ol' fact.

Side note: This chicks eyebrow makes me moist, it's perfection

Speaking of moist, I love Nicky Minaj...her style is nuts and her makeup is always so outlandish.  But I have one HUGE PEEVE.  She does the WORST nose contouring on the planet.

So here's her original nose:

Not only did she have it changed via surgery, but she furthers it's unnatural pointiness by contouring WITHOUT even attempting to blend:

On a positive note, she has amazing teeth!  But the nose, my god...

Alright, that's all for today...it's Friday and I'm trying to do as little as humanly possible.